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“I’ll do it,” I yawned. “Anything to relieve the tedium.”“G,g,g,good old Devina,” blurted the Brooke-Hamster. “Off you go, everyone else, c,c,c,close y,y,y,your eyes and c,co cu, cunt to a hundred. W,w,w,w, one...”“Oh for Christ sake Nigel I’ll count,” drawled Roger Ingham-Hardy. “It’ll be bloody Christmas before you get it out.”To the laughter of many and the drone of Roger’s enumeration, I fled the room and made my way upstairs, determined to find a hidey-hole so obscure that I might for go. What if I suffer a heart attack? I visualise the headlines in the local paper: Respectable local man dies in brothel – partner never knew. Witty whispers: ‘He went before he came!’ I alight at Pokesdown Station – aptly named – and I’m reminded of a rough suburb of London. I stroll down Boscombe High Street trying not to look like a bloke visiting a prostitute. I’m outside and press the buzzer – I’m sure everybody is looking at me. My heart is pounding. Answer the facking door! I want to say. A. The most commonbeing to extend the length of the jersey, which was then worn outside ofthe short (this required league approval), so that it resembled a tunicor modifying the shoulder straps, for example making them skinny andadjustable for length. More times than not, a long tunic top was pairedwith shorts featuring short legs. The new styles were usually introducedfor special games or events resulting in more than a dozen new uniformlooks per year per team. The variety of styles reinforced. She sat for 10 minutes or so watching him over the top of her book wondering how to strike up a conversation but she was too shy and didn't want to make a fool of herself so she sat there and just watched him careful not to let him catch watching him.Presently he stopped work and sat down for his morning break he looked at her and said "hello again catching some rays" glancing up at the sun "er yes" she said "arnt you a bit overdressed for sunbathing" he commented with a nice smile "er yes I.
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